But in real life things don’t go smoothly. At certain points in our lives, when we really need a clear-cut solution, the person who knocks at our door is, more likely than not, a messenger bearing bad news. It isn’t always the case, but from experience I’d say the gloomy reports far outnumber the others. The messenger touches his hand to his cap and looks apologetic, but that does nothing to improve the contents of the message. It isn’t the messenger’s fault. No good to blame him, no good to grab him by the collar and shake him. The messenger is just conscientiously doing the job his boss assigned him. And this boss? That would be none other than our old friend Reality.”
― Haruki Murakami
Yesterday my very own personal messenger stopped by to deliver a message. This message served to remind me exactly why I’ve often said reality sucks. In a matter of minutes, my world took on a slight tilt.
I needed some time to think.
If nothing else, I’m usually adept in finding ways to escape.
One this hot August day, I decided my mode of escape would be to go to an estate sale. It was not far from our house. It’d been publicized because it was at the home of a well-known retired astronaut. Those of us who grew up in the 60’s and 70’s know our space history and idolized our space heroes.
When I arrived at the sale, I’m pretty sure many waiting beside me were there just to see a place Captain Jim Lovell lived for part of his life. Hey, that was part of the reason I was there! This was confirmed by the fact many who walked out of the sale carried nothing–only the big smiles on their faces.
In hindsight, an estate sale may not have been my wisest choice for making a break from real life. Even on a good news day, I find these types of sales a stark reminder of the final days of life–not to mention it is a not so subtle reminder to get my own shit in order.
I walked through the rooms, thinking about many things. Not much caught my eye–maybe my mind was too preoccupied. As time passed I felt I’d received guidance and encouragement. Maybe it was left over energy from the miracle we call Apollo 13?
Earlier in the day I’d asked for help from my angels and spiritual guides. I asked for input in how to help my friends when they face crisis in their lives.
That help would come with conditions.
In order to help others I could no longer dodge my own old baggage. Dealing with that would not be so easy. I knew with the help I’d asked for, I’d be able to heal myself as well as help those I love.
I feel as though the frame holding my tapestry has been enlarged–the mighty weaver has many more threads to add and intertwine–I am thankful.
Dear God, when my problems seem overwhelming, I trust you to take care of what I cannot. I choose to fix my gaze on you and trust in your mighty power. I know that nothing will happen that is outside of your knowledge or control. Teach me to find shelter in your presence, to follow you one day at a time, and to take the steps that will overcome the challenges I face. Amen. ~Maria Shriver, I’ve Been Thinking~
Have a safe and happy weekend. Know you are loved.